Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Happy April!

As I wrap up my first full month of blogging my heart is filled with peace. There is no other way to describe it. The weather, with all its ups and downs, certainly parallels my April. There were times of snow... times when I didn't think I was going to be able to get up for even one more day. There were times of rain, difficulties/struggles/nagging thoughts about school and other to-dos. And of course, my saving grace, were the sunshine days. Days where nothing got me down. No word or course of action could change the joy that I had in my heart.

It's interesting that we so much desire to be joyful all the time. We are called to "rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice" (Phil 4:4) This means that no matter what trials we may be facing, no matter what mountain we are climbing, no matter what valley we are walking through, we are called to find JOY in the Lord. Do not confuse this with happiness, for happiness is a fleeting feeling, while joy should be apart of who we are. We have been given the gift of salvation, God has a plan dear sisters! He will guide us through the hardships. He would never bring us this far to leave us. So let's rejoice. Let's dance and sing for our Father. Let's run and fly. Let us be bold. Let us DO HARD THINGS. I'm learning that when I push my doubts, insecurities, troubles, etc. to the side and focus on the people around me, or at the very least focus my attention on God, it doesn't seem all that bad. Perspective is a jewel. Figuring out what's really important, that's a diamond!
I'm learning that to be a woman of God I must be modest in so many more things than just my dress. I'm learning from you, my dear sisters, about ways to prepare for my future as a wife and mother (God willing.) You all have blessed me so much, you have no idea. Thank you for an amazing April. All of your blogs, all of your insights, all of your troubles and triumphs, they have helped me. As I've began to get to know each and every one of you I feel completely blessed to have this amazing tool, the internet. For without it, I wouldn't know any of you, not one. And some of you have become an important part to my life, so I thank you for your blogging friendship :) I thank you for your acceptance to the blog world. I thank you for your wisdom and most of all, for your prayers. You are all beautiful young women of God, and I can't wait to see where May takes all of us!!

Speaking of May... tomorrow (for me) is May 1st!! A mere hour and a half from now sparks the beginning of the National Day of Prayer. I will be praying for all of you :) I encourage you all to take the time out and pray, for five minutes or for five hours. Whatever you can manage. God calls us to prayer, it may be hard and not yet quite part of your routine, but man... is it worth it :) God is amazing my dear sisters, let us devote some of our time to Him, let us speak to Him and let us hear what He has to say back. Prayer is powerful!

I love you all and pray this post finds you in good health and spirits!!
-Samantha

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

I'm not feeling creative...

And other times, I'm goofy, out-going, creative, and fun. Today, is not one of those days, so please forgive me for what will probably be a dull entry.

Sometimes. I just don't have the words to sound intriguing. Sometimes, I'm not really all that interesting. Sometimes, life just is... Sometimes.

School is crazy. I can't even begin to explain how much work I have to do. I feel as if all the teachers decided to do nothing for a whole year (with the exception of math) and then cram it all in at the end. I basically hate that.
Work is crazy, but good as always. Business is picking up slightly. I can't believe that in a few months I will have to leave the one place that I've LOVED to work at. That will be hard :(
Family and friends are good. I hate having to put my loved ones on the back-burner though. I think people should come before things like school, but, that doesn't tend to happen lately.
The good news is that I've been giving a lot more time to God than I ever have before :) I can see my relationship growing with him. I actually yearn to read the Word and I yearn to pray. It comes much easier than it ever has before.
Speaking of this, I'm reminded that I said I would post my testimony one day. Maybe today if I can get through my mountain of homework.

I pray all of you have been well!!

Sunday, April 27, 2008

So I am at work and I am pretty bored. Thought I would try out this mobile blogging :) Hmm. My best friend (Casey) is getting back from Aquire the Fire today. I can't wait to hear all about the conference :) In other news... I'm tired and we are eating BBQ again tonight, this time it's chicken! Well I think that's all :)

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Becoming a Godly Woman (oh boy!)

Lately it has been on my heart to become more of a Godly woman. It's not that I'm a horrible person compared with the world's standards, but when compared with God's standards? I could use a little help (yes, that's an understatement.) Thus, I've been watching more carefully what I wear, I've been trying to help out around the house, and I've been trying to watch the words that I say. I want my words to be edifying to the body of Christ and also non-believers. There is obviously SO MUCH MORE to being a Godly woman, but Rome wasn't built in a day.

Today I worked on helping out around the house more. I'm not feeling too well today, stemming from not feeling so well yesterday, but I managed to get out of bed long enough to assist my mommy in cleaning the windows in the house. Afterward I did some laundry and did the dishes. And then I ran to the grocery store to pick up some food for dinner. I actually FELT better. Who would have thought that such small tasks would make such a big difference physically and spiritually? As I was washing the windows I kept thinking about the house that I would one day be washing windows in. And my heart was filled with desire.

As followers of Christ we have higher expectations, higher standards. We should have bigger dreams and goals too. God can do sooo much with us if we just let Him take control. If He can turn my lazy bum into a daughter that actually HELPS around the house, He can do anything. Honestly. Our God, is an awesome God. And I know I say that a lot, but oh thank ya Jesus, it's soooo true!!

P.S. We had our first BBQ of the season, YUMMMMMMMY :D

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Update.

Setting: A small city in Idaho. The weather is dull. Rainy. And when it isn't raining it's cloudy. And it if isn't cloudy, it's cold. Are we aware that it's April?

Characters: God, Samantha Marie, Daddy & Mommy, Casey (best friend), Rebecca (best friend), David (best friend and date to prom), Michael (friend), Jaymi (friend that doesn't live here), dream boy (I'll explain later), and work people.


Premise: An average girl, with an ABOVE-average Father. She leans on Him for all understanding (sometimes, well often, failing but He always picks her back up off the floor.) Trying to make it through her last month of high school, Samantha is going crazy. She has finals to study for, prom plans to make, family and friends that want to spend time with her, and all she desires to do is spend time in the presence of God and read and write. Senioritis at its best. Will she get those graduation announcements finished? Will prom be a super-fun night? Will work pay the bills? Will she remember to always put God first?

Conflict: She feels stressed out with all that must be accomplished. She needs to prioritize but is feeling abundantly lazy. With all that she has going on, her flesh is pulling her in the direction of this boy that has come into her place of work twice and that she has seen at his place of work one time. She has even dreamed about the boy (hence "dream boy"). She doesn't want to think about him, because he's only a distraction. (Did she mention that she doesn't even know his name?)

Resolution: Stay tuned to find out what happens!!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Beauty.

Today I was eating peanuts. I don't do this very often, but for some reason I pulled out that bag and began taking apart the shells and eating the delicious insides. I got a peanut shell that held THREE PEANUTS. When I was younger, this was THE thing. To get a shell that contained THREE peanuts? Well, that was a mini-miracle. I smiled to myself as I remembered this childhood excitement and then my thoughts were led to a similar topic...

Beauty, magnificence, simplicity v. the outrageous. So often in today's society we are not amazed until something HUGE happens. We have become (in general) so apathetic that it takes something mind-blowing and really spectacular to grab our attention. And this to me, is sad.
Psalm 50:2 says "Out of Zion, the perfection of beauty, God shines forth." Therefore, God's beauty is everywhere. He shines forth, at all times, PERFECT beauty. Why does it take a four-leaf clover to make us excited? Why does it take dolphins flipping out of the ocean to make us gasp for breath? Should we not be amazed at the simple things as well? What about the blades of grass that surround the four-leaf clover, aren't they also just as intricate and beautiful? And what about the vast ocean that contains the dolphins? Isn't how much life the ocean holds amazing? Or what about a smile on the face of a child, or the aged? What about the baby kitten? So many things around us are BREATHTAKINGLY beautiful, we must only close our eyes and open our heart to see it. I'm guilty of this as well. I do not appreciate the beautiful world God has created nearly enough. But I'm praying that I can start.

Have you ever noticed something entirely breathtaking, yet utterly simple at the same time? Has God's beautiful world ever made you stop and think? Stop and stare? Stop and love?

"One thing have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple." Psalm 27:4

(Note: Both Bible verses are taken from the English Standard Version)

Monday, April 21, 2008

Good morning!

Let it be known that it is April...




...and we have snow on the ground.


Oh dear :(

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Life is... beautiful (:

Every day life is a bit more amazing. Every day, the gifts I unwrap become more spectacular. Every day, God is closing my eyes and opening my heart.

It's true what they say; it's better to give than to receive Today I gave one of my best friends a spiritual birthday party She's five years old in Christ. I got her balloons, a card, took her out to dinner and a movie. And it was lovely. The smile on her face was fantastic. That's the best gift I've gotten in a long time (-:
Tonight I danced with my dad to a song that was on Footloose. It was fun and there were tears in his eyes. My time here in this house is waning, I need to remember no matter how excited I am about college; I will be leaving my parents behind and that hurts them (let alone me.)

I want to dance, breathe, touch hearts, smile, laugh until I cry, move mountains, be broken, work hard, spread the love of Jesus Christ, and live life for God. My way is not of the world, but dang it, it's the best life!

Thursday, April 17, 2008

I love... you.

Today, approximately 1 half hour ago, I finished reading An Abundance of Katherines by John Green. Generally, I've tried to stop reading as much young adult fiction as I used to read and grow up into the "adult" world of novels. I have to admit I still enjoy a good young adult fiction novel as much as I used to. This novel was certainly one of those books that gave me pleasure in my heart to read. A basic moral to the story, so that I can set up my post, is that we all have stories. The past makes us who we are today. Our stories are what we leave behind. And by hearing someone else's story, we are changed if even slightly. And by telling our story, we can change someone else, if even slightly. That's a beautiful concept to me, and one I've always thought was true.

I'm a listener by nature. My name, Samantha, is even Hebrew for listener. By habit I tend to ask questions that delve into people's lives- past, present, and what they hope for the future. I collect stories. Some people collect rocks, stamps, or magazines, and I personally love to collect stories. Who each one of us is, is so intricate to the delicate way we are connected. God gave scientists the ability to discover parts of His amazing creation. He also gave people like me words; and ears to hear those words so that we could learn about one another.

Last summer I went down to Boise with my grandma and cousin. On the return trip home I asked my grandma to recount parts of her childhood, which she gladly did. I learned an abundant amount of information, some of which even her own children didn't know. For instance, my grandma used to dance!! How crazy is that? She was human? She was a teenager? By golly, it's so true. And it was lovely. She was bearing part of her soul to me, because the past once again, makes up who we are in the present. My grandma, at her 84 years old, was beautiful and vulnerable and inviting. Everything a woman should be, all because I asked her simple questions that began the journey of me getting to know her better.

This summer, I'm flying to Portland a week before our family reunion is to start so that I may spend time getting to know my grandparents who live in that area. I've spent weeks during summers previous as a young teenager, but never before has this urge to get to know them intimately been stronger. And it won't stop there.

I'm going to collect stories. Because for one, to know that someone wants to hear your story is probably an amazing gift (at least I think so.) But also, because a piece of each person will live in me... and I will be able to tell my children an abundant amount of stories. Because, as much as we hate to admit it, we are one people. God's children. And each one of us deserves to tell the story of our life, the story of God's life for us. And me? I want to know all of those stories.

If you ever feel like sharing, just know that I'm willingly here to "listen." I would love it as a matter of fact :) You are important to God, and you are important to me.

With all love,
Sami

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Joy in the face of adversity

Are you aware that no matter how happy you are, things can (and do tend) to go wrong? It's so true...

Sunday was another perfect day. Worship at church was soooo, refreshing and moving. I am not always able to focus on worship (bad Sami) but this past Sunday, I was really into it. It felt great to worship the CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE. The One that should have my praise and focus at all time. Yeah, it's great when we can give Him our small offering of praise and we can rest easy knowing that He enjoys it. The sermon was about how we need to watch our words and we can either give someone life with what we say or kill them (figuratively.) It's so true and something I've been trying to work on as well, God's timing is unmatchable.

Yesterday was pretty good, fairly busy at work, but a good day all in all.

Okay, now here comes the wrong. (And my disclaimer comes now, it really isn't a bad thing at all, which is another reason why I'm bothered so much.)
So, another new thing that God has placed on my heart to work on is to stop being so selfish. Selfish of my time, selfish with my money, selfish with possessions, and selfish with people. I was sure tested today. I'm going to prom with my best friend, David. We are doubling with my other best friend, Rebecca and her best guy friend, Jeffrey. A fun group, destined to have a good time. Or so I thought.
David went to the last dance with another close friend of his, Chelsea. Apparently, she asked him if her date and she could join us for dinner. BLARG. Should this bother me? No. Does it? Yes. Why? Because it's an attack of the enemy and a test. I need to not be selfish with PEOPLE. To be honest, my flesh DOESN'T want her to intrude on our cozy little group. -Sigh- I think God is showing me I have a long way to go. And I didn't pray about it like I should have when things went down and now I kind of made a mess of the situation and stepped on toes and really made it into a bigger deal than it was. Not to mention Rebecca is upset about it too. Oh dear, we'll need God to get us out of this mess. I have prayed about it since, and will continue to do so. Why is it so hard at times?

But the good news is, I'm completely joyful :) I put my trust in God and He will give me wisdom on the situation and everything will be okay.

Hm, so yes dear friends. That's my very teenagery-sounding post. Well, I am a teenager, and I am a sinner, sometimes these things are bound to happen. It's by God's GRACE that I am saved, not by anything I did or will do. Thank the good Lord :)

With all love,
Sami

Saturday, April 12, 2008

I'm happy


Today, was absolutely GORGEOUS, we had perfect weather. There wasn't a cloud in the sky all day. The temperature was a warm 75 degrees. God's creation was breathtaking to me today, not that it isn't always... but the beauty of a sunny, warm day speaks to my soul. The picture is the sky I see from my backyard as the sun sets. I completely forgot to take a picture of the beauty of mid-day, but that can be rectified tomorrow when we have the SAME weather!! (My soul is squealing with excitement.)

Today was rather productive. I finished one of my scholarship applications and got the rest in order so that I can finish them up later tonight or tomorrow. I bought my graduation dress at JC Penney's, it's super adorable :) I might take a picture and put it up later, or I might just wait until graduation day so you will get the full effect of my excited face :D I also went to Christian Gift and bought A Young Woman's Call to Prayer, because I definitely need to focus more on my prayer life and I bought God's Story (ESV), it's a version of the Bible in English Standard which is supposed to be really close to a word for word translation, even more so than KJV... at least that's what the guide to all the translations said :)

The rest, as they say, is history. I spent my afternoon doing some reading for English, hung out with my parents in the backyard, read some blogs, and plan on spending some major time with God after I finish up this post! :) I truly do love my life. I am beyond blessed.

-Samantha

Thursday, April 10, 2008

I'm hungy

Not that my hunger is really... pivotal to this post, I just thought I would share something random :)

I'm home sick today from school. I think I feel so horrid because of just plain being exhausted. I haven't been getting much sleep this week, for obvious reasons, and I think my body finally gave up on me. It was nice to sleep in and now I'm going to be able to do my homework that actually needs to get done, instead of listening to my teachers (no matter how interesting they are) talk about nothing really that important. YAY! -Victory dance-

I still have to go to work tonight :(

Hm. I'm trying really hard to press into God this week. I feel really distant, and kind of even angry. I don't know why. Well, I do know that it's a spiritual attack which is why I'm trying so hard to turn to God with everything, and it does help, but I am discouraged still. Satan just has these footholds in our lives and he holds on tight so that we can't do the work of God. But I just have to say "It isn't going to work little guy. You are NOTHING compared to God. You will not win." And that makes me feel a little better :)


I'm working on crocheting a blanket for my little one year old cousin, Claire. She's a CUTIE. When I get it finished (and that may take awhile!) I will post some pictures :) I want to finish it by this Sunday or the next that way I can give it to my aunt and uncle who live in a house behind us and they can give it to my cousin when they see her at church (we don't go to the same one.)

How have all of you been? Any prayer requests? I pray you all are well!! Take care!

With His Love,
Samantha

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Sometimes I feel like running into a wall...

Not enough to cause any serious damage, but maybe just a concussion that will knock me off my feet for a few days ya know? ;)

And of course, I will never do this. But I miss the days where I could come home from school and RELAX instead of going 55 miles per hour to finish my homework and scholarships and chores before flying off to work for five hours. BLECK.

Being back at school this week is proving so far to be rather torturous. I'm completely ready to graduate now. I just want prom to come, and then graduation. Who needs all that stuff in between anyway? But I know God wouldn't want me to be rushing ahead of Him, so I'm trying to remember that each day is a lesson and a blessing and to take each breath as if it could be my last. (IT'S HARD!)

I bought my laptop for school the other day. It's fairly basic, but will do all that is necessary and it was on sale, yay! :) I got a cute bag to go with it. I feel so "mature" typing on a laptop that I purchased with my own money (albeit, tax money, but it's all the same...) It reminds me so much of the fact I'll be leaving in a few months for COLLEGE :) YAY!

Last night at work, these "gangster" dressed teenagers (about my age actually) came in and bought a safe. I knew one of them, and I know he's into drugs. My manager told me that groups come in like that all the time. They buy these safes to store their big shipments of drugs and then they try to return the safes after they've sold all the drugs. It's truly DISHEARTENING to see people of my generation, kids my age and SO MUCH YOUNGER partying, doing drugs, sleeping around. And then I think about it and realize it's only going to get worse and my heart breaks even more for my own kids. I know it's bigger than me and things have to get even worse before The End, but... it's still sad. Prayer is powerful though and I just have to remind myself of that.

Sorry for the schizophrenic post, I feel like I haven't been on in months as opposed to days. I hope you all have been well!! (: You are in my prayers!!

With His Love,
Samantha

Friday, April 4, 2008

MMM Prayer :)

Recently I've been reading a series of books called The Yada Yada Prayer Group. These are fairly popular among Christian Chick Lit so perhaps some/many of you have heard of these books. Well, a character named Nony is always praying scripture. For example, taking a psalm and applying it to what is happening in her life, or someone else's life in the prayer group.

For some reason, I had never done this before. Until two days ago. Wow! It's POWERFUL. I'm not so sure why prayer keeps seeming to be this novel idea to me. I know in my mind prayer is powerful, but I'm finally understanding in my heart how powerful it is. God really is listening. Jesus died so I could have this open communication with Him and the Father at all times. And when words aren't there? The Holy Spirit intervenes for me. That's love if I've ever known any kind of love.

I delight in discovering new things about this Christian walk of faith. Being saved only 1 year and 10 months is such a blessing. I still am in awe of many things. I hope I never lose this. So many of my friends and family always remark upon how me becoming a new Christian revitalized their own faith as they saw me living out my new faith. That's encouraging :) and I never want to stop being that light for people. I never want to feel that any part of this walk is "old" and I'm too "above it."

Even on the cloudiest of days, the sun is still shining up there, we just have to find it (:

Thursday, April 3, 2008

Wow.

Have you ever gotten that overwhelming sense of urgency that you are forgetting to do something even though you already have so much to do?

Yeah... I just realized that in addition to the literally HOURS of homework that I have, I also need to fill out three scholarship applications and write essays for all three.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I'm like the little engine that could ;)

Trip Review and other randomosity.

Well, I got back from Boise two days ago. It was a WHOLE lot of fun. I love getting away from the valley and experiencing something else for awhile. Plus, in about four months I'll be living in Boise, so it was nice to get even more experience driving around there and figuring out where things are.

My lovely best friend, Rebecca, and our other close friend, Heather left about 10:00 in the morning. We listened to some good music on the way down there including a newer band, Cadia, I recommend them if you haven't yet had a chance to listen :-) We stopped in McCall for lunch and ended up in Boise about 4:30 there time. Had dinner at Red Robin that night, it was delicious. I chatted with my auntie Janice until 11:00 (we were staying at her house) and then fell dead asleep, driving really does take energy, I promise! :-)

Saturday we got up and drove to Kohl's. The girlies found a couple of things to buy, then we went to Maurice's and I found a cute shirt. Then it was on to the mall! One reason we went down there was so Heather and I could find our prom dresses, and we did!! :) Mine is an olivey green color, it's REALLY pretty. After prom (which is May 3rd) I will post a picture of all of us so you can see all three of our pretty dresses :) After shopping for about... five hours we went back to my aunt's house and watched Enchanted. Oh my goodness! I love that movie. It's such a happy, feel good movie!! We also watched The Hills. It's one of Rebecca's favorite shows. It completely SHOCKS me how they live their life. We were having conversations through-out the whole series about how they look so unhappy, even when they are smiling. I think praying for them would be a good thing for me to do... I can't be the one to tell them about the love of Christ, but I CAN be someone that prays that someone will tell them.

Sunday we went to the church I might end up going to when I move. It's Calvary Chapel and it's pretty big (at least for a girl whose biggest church service has been 250 some people) I'm really praying hard about going to the church that God wants me to be, I've never had a church home and would love to have one while at college. The rest of the day we spent chatting, watching movies, and doing homework. (Yes, the evil teachers gave us homework! How rude ;) hehe!) We have so many weird random inside jokes. I love that! We took some really goofy pictures and I just may post a few once I get them uploaded!

Monday we did even MORE shopping. First we went downtown and I drove them past BSU's campus and then we found a parking spot and did a whole lot of window shopping. Shops downtown are EX-PEN-SIVE! We ended up going back to the mall so we could find matching graduation shoes and found the perfect pair for all three of us at JC Penney's :) They are white, with a small heel, very cute. Now the three of us will have matching shoes and lei's! I'm very excited for graduation!

Tuesday we came home and I was exhausted by the time I crawled into my very own bed. I'm so thankful we got to go and that God kept us safe the whole time. That drive can be pretty dangerous, plus it was in the lower 30s all while we were down there and so the roads were questionable, but our Father took care of us :) I started to get sick AGAIN, but I slept a lot and I feel completely better today, I think I was just fatigued.

Went back to work last night. It was actually not too bad. I was thinking I would dread it the whole day and then have a bad attitude, but I spent time in prayer and praise and God changed my attitude to one of Jesus :) I love how going to God with our problems can make things... better, not perfect, but He just fills us up with His love and we can continue facing everything. It's truly refreshing. Prayer is so powerful, I'm learning that more and more. Work was interesting in that the person who stole still hasn't been caught so we all have our privileges taken away, it makes the job kind of difficult. I just gotta keep praying for resolution and for the person who did it.

Sorry if you read that whole entry. It was kind of more for my memory than anything else, but if you did read this whole thing then thank you for your time! :-) Now tell me, how have you all been?!!