Friday, August 1, 2008


"I was finally able to doze off because I knew you were coming over. I knew I wasn't alone."

These words were spoken to me by a good friend who is going through a really recent, really rough break-up. Obviously, she hasn't been able to sleep, because of all the pain. She was saying how weird it is to be alone.

Once you are part of a two-some for an extended period of time, it begins to define you. That alone, should not make you the person that you are, but it is a large part of you no matter how much you spin it. We can try to pretend a relationship is just a relationship, but I think most married couples, and most serious relationshippers would tell us that a large part of you is defined by your relationship. So when that ends, the whole definition of your life changes.

Why do we want to be held? Why do we yearn for a space (typically a body of the opposite sex) to fill a void? Why do we want someone to listen to us? Why do we want someone to tell us everything is going to be all right? Why do we have family? Why do we have friends? Why do we go through messy relationships?

Why? Because, we don't want to be alone. We all just want to know that if we were to die, someone would notice. We just want to know that if we were hurt, someone would be there. We just want to know that if we had exciting news, we would be able to share it with someone. Humans were designed for relationships. And in a world where it's a struggle each and every day, we need people on our side for encouragement, love, and laughter for when the going gets tough. God gave us the beautiful gift of love.
1 Cor 13:13 says " But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love" and John 13:34 says "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another."
I adore relationships, find them fascinating, enjoy my own, deeply believe they are vital to life. But I especially love John 13:34 because Jesus is calling us to love one another as He has loved us. The Son of the CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE loves us, loves us deeply, knows us perfectly, knows what our hearts desire, and that truly is the only perfect relationship we can ever have.
I also like that Jesus calls us to love one another how He loves us. That's a tall order (one we cannot fulfill with our own strength and love) but it's a beautiful thing when we love one another like Jesus loves us.

So when people ask me how I can possibly spend so much time listening to people talk about their problems and be there to comfort them and be there at all odd hours of the day and night, well it's because I'm called to do it. And I can think of few better ways to serve the Son than to love His bride the best that I can.

Running after His Heart,


CaseyMay said...

I already talked your face on when I read this. SO...I'm just gonna say that your words are so true and your heart is AMAZING.

I love your face on and off like a light switch. btw I posted a new blog :)

A Young Lady In Waiting said...

What a truth! People always say that its "just a realtionship" and that its not gonna hurt when it ends but we all know thats not true! It sounds like your an awesome friend and that you where a great comfort to your friend in need!

Its always nice to know that some one notices when we're missing or when we're are present. Loneliness would have to be my biggest struggle, sometimes its just over welming exspecialy in the summer when theres not much to do and not many people around.

Well I better stop writting before I start a part two!

Many blessings and prayers!
Your sister in HIM

Paige said...

Samantha, you said all of that perfectly. I, too, have been thinking about the subject alot lately- relationships I have with my family, with the people I work with, relationships I once had, and of course the one I desire so much. It can all be so confusing, yet God is so willing to listen to the many ways I make things confusing and He always clears things up for me.
What a wonderful friend you are.

åslaug said...

A lovely post. And your words are so true. I think the reason relationships are so important and we hate lonelyness so, is the fact that we were CREATED TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP, not just with other human beings, but WITH THE CREATOR HIMSELF.
I love the way you quote the Bible and then explains that we're called to it. It's so easy to forget that many of the verses in the Bible contains a calling for us. A calling from our loving Prince and Creator. A calling that we should lovingly respond to. It's like when I was reading in Luke last night. Chapter 6, verse 30, says:

Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back.

I've read the Gospel of Luke before, I'm sure I've read this excact verse before. The calling in it never actually struck me before yesterday: Give to ALL who asks you. That's quite radicallly, isn't it? If anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. That's also quite radically. But I can't ignore it. It's Jesus very words. It's His loving command, and my calling.

Your sister in Christ Jesus